October 23, 2025

[7:19 pm] 

I feel so depressed and tired, it's not even funny anymore. I fucking hate being a hikikomori, i don't even know why people even glaze this shit. 

Everyday feels the exact same: I wake up late, I go on my phone and doom-scroll tiktok all day, I eat while doom-scrolling the internet or "chatting" with people on discord who just blatantly ignore me no matter what I say, I stay up till 2-7am,  and I go to bed, and my day repeats. I can't even remember the last time I spoke with my ex "friends" (who haven't reached out to me this whole time) or the last time I left the house, and if my grandma doesn't die soon, things are never gonna change and I'll die alone.

The closest to an actual "relationship" I ever had was with my friend, and that dickhead replaced me who's just there to sabotage our relationship and probably has something against me, even though I've never met the foid in my entire life, which makes it 10x worse because I never did anything to her and she's trying to separate me and him so that he'll get dependent on her and she'll leave him in favor of some chad with money. 

 That's what all these bitches do they ruin perfectly happy relationships, they manipulate the man into ditching their female friend, and when she's the only one he has, she dumps him, takes all his money, and accuses him of rape as a way to avoid accountability. I don't care if the cops tag my ass for this, but if I ever run into her one day, I'll kill her, I'm not gonna let some Stacey home-wrecking whore ruin MY and my friend's life just because SHE can't keep her legs closed.

And I just learned that in prisons, sometimes the inmates will mix boiling water and sugar in a container and then pour that on their victim as a form of throwing acid on someone, best part? the sugar sticks to the victims because sugar becomes viscous and sticky when in contact with hot water, so you can't get it off, and because it makes the water hotter than boiling, it effectively burns the victim. Idk about anyone else, but that's how I'd hurt this bitch if I ever got my hands on her, maybe i could pour it down her throat too so that her esophagus burns open and she suffocates to death and shit, HELL! I'd do that shit to Callimara too because she was talking shit about my FP and manipulated me into also hating him for no reason. 

If you don't know who Callimara is, here's who I'm talking about. 

 

(i don't care if she gets harassed over this post, she fucking deserves it, and so does anyone associated with her, fuck it.)

Fucking slutty ass piece of shit, I wonder how cool and confident she'd be with her poorly written "rEdEsIgNs" if she lost her tits or wasn't pretty (you can get away with anything if you're attractive enough these days). Bet she probably stole those designs and the design of her persona from someone else too and claimed them as her own so she could profit off of it. 

And why does she care SO much about grooming when I bet she's never done a single thing to help an ACTUAL grooming victim, huh? I'll bet this bitch only got into the FP drama specifically to profit off of THAT too, I'll bet if she actually saw a kid get kidnapped by an actual predator, she'd turn a blind eye like the hypocrite she is, because care about grooming victims, only the money she gets out of "spreading awareness" of it.

In-fact I'm not afraid to bet that she groomed the girl herself and framed FP for it so that she could get away with it, then paid Ally McWhateverTheFuckHerNameWas to make "evidence" to put against him, or maybe it's the other way around and she's getting paid to "expose" FP for shit that I KNOW he didn't do. And the only reason why none of them have been caught yet is because they managed to pull off a lie so convincing that nobody has actually bothered to find anything against the two whores, meaning that they can live perfectly normal lives while FP suffers because nobody will believe him.

Either way, I hate this bitch so much that even just the mere thought of her existence makes me want to break something or scratch myself out of anger, oh my fucking GODDD. If she has no haters, it means I'm dead, and I hope the truth about her gets revealed one day so I can at least not look like some insane schizo for saying all of this.

--- 

Oh, and by the way, Callie! the only reason FP created a "made up" mental illness was because he didn't want people to fetishize any real disorders because of how the game depicted it and then him having to deal with people accusing him of fethishizing the disorder in question, even though he's already stressed enough as it is from trolls constantly harassing him and anyone associated with him. (I would know because I got scolded for it one time, but he's forgiven me because I didn't understand at the time)

But you? YOU straight up fetishized psychosis as this "yandere" disorder bullshit, and you also romanticized what it's like the mental hospital, and didn't even bother to do any research beforehand for EITHER of those. In-fact, you didn't do any research at all while making that Ayano redesign, did you?

NEWS FLASH, ASSHOLE: it's nothing like how your Stacey ass depicted it, and I would know because I've actually been to the mental hospital, not one, not twice, THREE SEPARATE GOD DAMN TIMES, one voluntary, and I was basically tortured in there psychologically, effectively making my mental health as bad as it is to this day. 

I had to deal with people yelling and throwing things almost daily, one of the patients having a seizure and nearly dying, HELL, I even nearly got my ass jumped by another patient because HE had a bad day and happened to have anger problems stemming from trauma with the justice system, it was HORRIBLE. And I couldn't even have my comfort plushie with me while I was waiting to get admitted because they were worried about other people "getting sick" (even though my plushie was cleaner than a Chinese lollipop factory), so I was having a god damn panic attack and was exhausted by the time I got there. And ALL of that is just referring to my last admission to the hospital, aka my least horrible experience I've had, my other two admissions (which were both involuntary) were much worse, AND I WAS 12 YEARS OLD FOR FUCK SAKE.

The only "treatment" that I received during ALL of those admissions? 

Just some shitty medications that do absolutely nothing except give me the possibility of developing Steven Jonson's disease (a skin condition that could kill me btw), and a 30 minute "group session" that doesn't teach you jack shit about the world and everyone's too busy fighting each-other to focus anyway. I literally had to rely on another patient comforting me just to be stable enough to go home, and even that barely helped because she was also dealing with her own problems and didn't know how to help most of the time, it was draining for both of us. 

And all of that is just recounting MY experience alone, I'm sure FP's been to the hospital too before making that apology video and had it worse than me (I could tell from the look in his eyes that SOMETHING happened to him and he suffered before making that video, poor guy), but you wouldn't give a shit at all, would you?

So yeah, next time you wanna shit on FP for something, at least do you god damn research before opening your mouth, you retarded ass hoe. 🥰

fuck you. 

---

Okay, that got completely derailed there, but just in general I hate my life so much, it's always the same insufferable people and the news only ever covering the bad stories, and I just don't feel alive anymore. 

I need to run away to California and live with FP so I won't be miserable like this, and maybe one day we could get married and have kids or something! I'd love to live a life with him and shit, and I'm still upset that he rejected me because he wasn't "looking for a relationship" (which i get because he has to work on the game, but still can't help but feel hurt) 

 I can only merely fantasize about it for now... :(

idk what else to write about except for this funny cat pic cause fuck it, why the hell not? :p